A Lot of Things

*Note: I wrote this post almost a month ago and am just now submitting it. Whoops*

Home with my sisters this summer

There are many things to say, but I 'm not always quite sure how to say them.

This fourth of July my grandfather passed away.
I will continue to remain grateful that I got to spend a couple of days with him that week, and that I even got to hold his hand and tell him some of my favorite memories and things about him.

I will also continue to try to accept the things that I cannot change, and this was one of them. I will try to awake each new day full of hope with a belief in myself and the optimism and determination to make the things that are in my control good. He would want that.

For everyone who sent me and my family messages, food, help, or any kind of generous or loving action, thank you.  You showed me what it's like to have wonderful people in your family's lives during a heartbreaking time. I will never forget that, and know that you were also teaching me how I can someday help others in their time of need. Actions speak louder than words, and I was impacted by that. Thank you.
 And I will just believe that he is up there reading my words the same as you.

New things going on in my life-

Photoshoot in May
 

- I was accepted into Washington's Teaching Artist Training Lab program held through Seattle Repertory Theatre. I applied for it back in May and was certain I wouldn't be accepted this year. Then I went home, everything happened there, then I flew back up to Seattle, and I had honestly forgotten about it. I was shocked and humbled and happy to find out that not only was I offered a spot, but they offered me a beautiful scholarship as well. Our first in-person classes/workshops meet next week, and I am feeling all the happy/anxious/nervous/excited feelings.

Open Door rehearsal

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I am now an actor for Open Door Theatre's educational touring shows in Spanish and English. Open Door stands for something that is very dear and close to my heart, and I couldn't be more excited to work with this company and to empower and equip children with the skills to stand up for themselves against all types of abuse and believe that they are worthy just as they are. Did I mention I'm part of the Spanish touring team? Learning lines and acting in Spanish is going to be a whole lot of work and FUN! Rehearsals started this week and I know it's going to be wonderful. What do you say, Mom and Dad? My minor in Spanish DOES have a purpose after all!

-As of this week I have accepted a position as a mentor for a program called Speak, through Young Women Empowered, an organization that reaches out to youth using theatre and art.

-Last but not least- Barefoot in the Park opens next Friday! Did I mention that I'm playing Corie? Did I mention that this is one of my top dream roles I didn't think I'd get a chance to play?


Beautiful 80s jeans for Barefoot
 

The show is going to be great ( Well, you can also be the judge of that if it means you come out to see it!) and I feel incredibly giddy over stepping into her shoes. Granted, it did just hit me this last week that I practically never leave the stage (pros of seeing the show if you like seeing me, cons if you don't), but I'm ready for the challenge and I have a great team of people putting it all together.



All of these things happening in my life are wonderful and I am loving them. So many of them are the kinds of things I dreamed for years I'd end up doing with my life, and it feels so good to see parts of my life coming together and holding purpose and meaning.

On the flip side, since all of these wonderful things are happening and coming together in my life, it's put this new feeling inside of me that I haven't really experienced yet. I'm not sure what the word is for it, so I'll just explain it like this

Amberlee finds out about all of the mentioned things above. She jumps up-

"ALL OF THESE THINGS ARE HAPPENING TO ME!!! I DREAMED OF THIS!!! I WANTED THIS!!!)

Smiles, spins, laughs, sits back down. Takes a breath.

"All of these things are happening to me. I dreamed of this. I wanted this...
Now what?"

Her eyes widen.

"What will I do?...How will I do it?...... Will I be good at it?
I dreamed of all of this....
What happens after it's over?"

It's silly, isn't it? I take four steps forward and my brain wants to jump to step five, six, and seven. Why? I suppose it's a human thing. The more peaceful side of me (thank goodness for THAT) calmly reminded me of one of my favorite quotes. Not to pull out the Disney, but...

Rapunzel: I've been looking out of a window for eighteen years, dreaming about what I might feel like when those lights rise in the sky. What if it's not everything I dreamed it would be?

Flynn Rider: It will be.

Rapunzel: And what if it is? What do I do then?

Flynn Rider:  Well, that's the good part I guess. You get to go find a new dream.

Yes. The things you work for and believe in and dream of will be even better than what you dreamed. Because it will be real. And afterwards? You get to keep dreaming.

Breathe, dream, do, go, and never give up. Hug your family and friends as much as you can, and love as much as you can everywhere you can to all.

-A



Breakfast Club cast, May



 

Photoshoot in May